“We All Want Impossible Things,“by Catherine Newman has been said to be a very sad book to read. That’s no surprise as the story follows Edi, who is put in hospice after a diagnosis of ovarian cancer. Edi’s hospice care is in a city away from her family, and her main caretaker becomes her best friend, Ash.
This duo of friends have lived through over 42 years of friendship. They’ve been by each other’s side through marriages, infertility, childbirth, and life’s ups and downs. They are more like sisters than just friends and their families are intertwined and closely knit together. “We All Want Impossible Things” doesn’t only cover the difficulties and emotional strain of caring for a loved one in hospice, but also the nuances of everyday life.
As Ash helps with Edi’s care and visits her daily, she also has a lot going on at home. Mostly with her ex-ish husband, her two daughters, and a revolving door of interesting lovers. As the story unfolds Edi and Ash not only reminisce on their lifetime of friendship, but also make plans for her funeral speech (Edi has suggestions for Ash), the quest for Edi’s perfect cake—her dying wish, and the heartache of saying goodbye. Goodbye to your husband, brother, your son, your friends, and loved ones.
This novel is also a beautiful tribute to caretakers everywhere. From those who help with the daily care of loved ones, to those who drop in to entertain and ease the strain on their mental health, and the community of family and friends that stand by someone’s side during their last moments of life.
At first, I was afraid to dive in to this story because I had seen so many reviews and heard a few podcasts about this novel all saying it was a gut-wrenching experience to read about someone dying. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve lived through the hospice experience with loved ones, that the journey of hospice was not one that caused me to cry personally. I knew what to expect going in I guess you could say. I did find it sad having to say goodbye to your best friend. Also the scenes where Edi and her brother talk about their childhood, or he expresses his love for her to Ash, did touch me. Maybe this is because I have a brother of my own. Maybe it’s because it’s a relationship that you don’t always get to read about in books.
I’m not going to say “We All Want Impossible Things,” is an easy read, or a light-hearted read. But, it does have a lot of funny parts—some come from Ash’s life and how she’s dealing with the death of her friend (most of them not good) or about how Ash and Edi express themselves and their past. What friendship duo isn’t filled with funny backstories? But, if you’re apprehensive about reading this book because you think you’ll be crying in every page as some reviewers made it sound, don’t worry, you won’t. I only got teary-eyed at the end of the story. And that’s not to say it isn’t beautifully written, because it absolutely is. But I think it’s more because I knew what hospice was like and had an idea of what to expect about a book covering death in this way. It won’t necessarily tear your heart apart, but it will make you appreciate your friendships and maybe call/text your friends and remind them you love them. It will make you appreciate the time you have with your friends now. And it will teach you how to be a supportive friend though all of life’s stages, especially the messy and ugly ones.
For me, “We All Want Impossible Things” gets 5 stars. Add it to your TBR list now.
